


pyromania and other extreme sports

by spocksass



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, allura smells like cotton candy, hunk wants to own 23 dogs, james puts out the fire in keith's heart, keith is a pyromaniac, lance is a merman, lotor is a vegan hipster, pidge listens to kpop, shiro gets high, zarkon for president 2k16
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-01 19:43:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15780804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spocksass/pseuds/spocksass
Summary: keith's life is the epitome of ironic, the first reason being he plays with fire when his dad died trying to put one out.  the second reason being meeting a flight instructor who is hot, works at his airport, and lives in his apartment building.  the third reason being that the entire world seems to want to keep him from getting with this guy.





	1. a man, a match, and a blender

The fire alarm went off.Keith rolled his eyes and directed his attention to the flame in front of him.Lance was at work.Hunk was in class.No one could stop him now, certainly not a stupid fire alarm.

 

Keith carefully set another lit match on the pile.

* * *

Keith rolled his eyes again as the fireman comes out of the building, telling everyone that it’s safe to go back inside.  Of course it’s safe.  He never would have actually let the fire get out of control.  Probably.

 

He looked to the people filing in the door and saw a very tall, very muscular, very attractive man in a tight black t-shirt framing his chiseled chest and thought to himself that the only thing tighter than that t-shirt were his pants right now.

 

Keith couldn’t believe he’s turned on by fire and strange men.

* * *

“Keith!  What the hell?!  I get back from work and our kitchen is charred!”  Lance is furious, which is completely reasonable but also completely unnecessary.

 

Keith rolled his eyes for the third (maybe fourth) time that day.“It’s fine, Lance.I didn’t burn down the apartment.”

 

“But you burned my plant!!You burned Hunk’s blender!It can’t even blend properly now!”

 

Keith looked to Hunk, who was leaning against the blackened counter, arms crossed, clearly upset.“You know, I usually stay out of your guys’s arguments, and I even ignore your pyro tendencies, but seriously, Keith, I liked that blender.It was a good blender.”

 

“We definitely aren’t getting our security deposit back now,” Lance grumbled, throwing his hands in the air dramatically, even though for the situation at hand, it shouldn’t be considered dramatic.

 

Keith sighed, ignoring Lance.“I’m sorry about your blender, Hunk.I’ll buy you a new one.”

 

“Don’t bother.It wont be the same.That Blendaroo 3000 was limited edition.”Hunk’s voice was flat with no emotion as he shook his head and walked out of the kitchen.

 

Keith was left alone with a fuming Lance.He tried to change the subject.“I saw a hot guy today.”

 

Lance rolled his eyes and snapped, “Did you set him on fire?Is that why he was hot?”

 

“Uh…. No.I think he lives in our building.He has black hair and a prosthetic arm and is probably a Greek Adonis or something, I dunno.”

 

Lance raised an eyebrow.“Listen, Pyro, I don’t care about your Greek Adonis.I am going to take a nap right now, and when I wake up, I want to see this kitchen as not-black as it can be.Got it?”He now had a finger in Keith’s chest and his face was contorted to where Keith could see up his nostrils.

 

Keith looked down at the finger, then back up to its owner.“Sure thing, Waterboy.”

 

Lance narrowed his eyes and literally stomped out of the kitchen.He peered back in seconds later, eyes narrowed.“Fuck Adam Sandler.”

* * *

“Can you put twenty gallons in N575QT, Keith?”

 

Keith looked up from where he was sketching his black-haired Adonis to his boss.“Sure.”He stood up, closing his notebook and hopped over the counter to the door outside.”

 

“Keith, please walk around the counter.You’re setting a bad example for our guests.”

 

Keith ignored Iverson and made his way to the fuel truck outside.N575QT was a new tail number, not one he normally saw at the airport.He finally spotted the blue numbers on the side of a bright yellow Cessna 150 with… were those airbrushed flames on the front?He parked the fuel truck beside the interesting airplane as the owner stepped out of the cockpit and holy fucking shit it was Adonis.The guy who flew “QT” was quite the “cutie” (pun intended).

 

The man was dressed in a backwards cap, sleeveless shirt saying “Get High,” board shorts, and dock shoes.Keith thought he looked ridiculous.Sexily ridiculous.

 

Keith hopped out of the truck and walked to the back of the truck to grab the pump.The man walked over to him.“Hi, I’m Shiro.I’m banner towing out of this airport.”Adonis stuck out his hand for Keith to shake. 

 

Keith looked at the pump and then to Shiro’s hand.In an attempt to hang the pump back up, he dropped it, where it proceeded to spray fuel all over the hot pilot.Well, there go his chances with him.Keith quickly grabbed the pump and properly hung it up.“Holy shit, I’ve never done that before…”He looked, wide-eyed from the puddle at Shiro’s feet up to his face. 

 

Shiro, who was now soaked in highly-flammable fuel (and boy did he look good wet), let out a hearty laugh.“Now there’s a first.”He could catch on fire any second with how hot he looked, but for once, Keith didn’t want a fire to start.

 

“Um…. L-let me bring you inside.”

* * *

“Keith!  What the hell?!”  Iverson was pissed.  Like, super duper pissed.  So pissed that it looked like he was going to have a hernia from how hard he was clenching his fists.  Or maybe a hemorrhoid, one of the two.  

 

Keith gave a little cough.“I got distracted and dropped the fuel pump.”

 

Shiro was in the bathroom washing up, and probably never wanted to see Keith again.He wouldn’t doubt if Shiro decided to climb out through the bathroom window just so he wouldn’t have to see him. 

 

“And what made you so distracted that you dropped the fuel pump and sprayed fuel all over our newest guest who just bought a spot in our hangars!

 

Keith wasn’t going to say that it was Shiro’s gorgeous muscles.“That same flight instructor.”

 

Iverson didn’t seem to hear him.“If you ever want to be a pilot, Keith, you have to step up your game and Not!Drop!The Fuel Pump!”

 

“What does dropping the fuel pump have to do with being a pilot?”

 

“Discipline, Keith, discipline!Something you lack!”

 

“Great pep talk, boss.”

 

Keith took his anger out by lighting Iverson’s important paperwork on fire.

* * *

“Hunk, I am so fucked.”

 

Hunk looked up from his computer, eyebrows raised.“Why are you so f-ed, Keith?”Did he really just bleep out ‘fuck?’

 

Keith dropped on the couch next to the big guy.“Because I sprayed fuel all over our newest flight instructor.I’m going to die.”

 

Hunk looked back to his screen, choked noise coming from his mouth.He was trying not to laugh.

 

Keith was trying not to die, but they were both failing at trying not to do things.“I need help, Hunk.What do I do?I won’t ever be able to look at him again.He probably hates me.”

 

“Keith, I don’t know anything about relationships or angsty pining over wanting one.I can’t help you.My goal in life is to own 23 dogs and build rockets.”

 

“But Hunk!I need my friend to help!”Keith flopped over Hunk’s lap.

 

Hunk rolled his eyes and put his computer to the side.“First off, you burnt my blender and now you’re asking for help.Second off, I forgive you, but it’s about the principle of the matter.And third off, you’re acting more dramatic than Lance.”He sighed and gave Keith’s head a pat.“Listen, next time you see him, just apologize and see if you can take him out to dinner to make up for it.”

 

Keith jolted up, nearly smacking his head on Hunk’s computer.“That’s a great idea!Except for the fact that I’m broke and can’t afford a nice dinner…”

 

Hunk looked deep in thought as he moved his laptop away from Keith’s big head.“Lance can get you free tickets to the aquarium.”

* * *

“No.”

 

Keith had expected a little difficulty in getting the tickets from Lance, but the younger man genuinely seemed adamant about not giving them to him.“But whyyyy?”

 

Lance huffed, arms crossed.“Because you burnt our kitchen to a crisp!Why should I give you free tickets to see my life’s work?”

 

Keith rolled his eyes.“Lance, that was a thing of the past.”

 

“It was two days ago!”

 

“Two days ago is the past, dumbass.”

 

Lance looked taken aback, eyes wide.He raised an eyebrow.“Dumbass?You definitely aren’t getting those tickets now.”He turned to walk away.

 

“Lance, wait!I’ll do you a favor!”Keith really was desperate if he promised Lance a favor.

 

The taller boy turned around, smug grin on his face.“What kind of favor?”

 

Keith put his pride to the side.“As long as it doesn’t involve humiliating myself, anything.”

 

Lance pouted.“You’re no fun, Keith.”

 

“So can I get those tickets?”

* * *

 

Keith was indeed humiliated.He was dressed as Prince Eric and Lance was the Little Mermaid.They were both standing on a rock overlooking the beach, and it was really fucking windy.

 

“It’s for a photoshoot,” Lance had said when telling Keith the favor he needed.“I need more merman photos for my website.”

 

Hunk, who so graciously agreed to be the photographer, currently had Keith with his arms wrapped around Lance, who’s red wig was tickling his nose, and both were supposed to be gazing longingly out to the ocean. 

 

“Alright, now look like you’re gazing longingly out to the ocean.”

 

Keith sighed and put on his best longing face, imagining he was longing for Shiro.

 

“Keith, that look is perfect.Keep it coming.”

 

“Isn’t this great, Keith?”Keith could hear the smugness in Lance’s voice.“You make the perfect Prince Eric.”

 

“Didn’t Ariel lose her voice?Yeah, I think so, so shut up,”Keith retorted.

 

“Ah, true love.” Hunk chuckled with another click of the camera.

 

Keith was so glad that Shiro wasn’t here to see him. 

 

“Keith, is that you?”

 

Keith’s eyes widened.Of fucking course.He slowly turned his head to the voice.“H-hey, Shiro!”How the hell did Shiro know his name

 

There he was, dressed in a tight black tank top and shorts, body shining from sweat.“Iverson told me that he gave you a talk on operating the fuel truck.Honestly, it’s not a big deal.I’ve been covered in stranger fluids.”He chuckled and Keith thought he was going to die.“I like your outfit.I didn’t know you were into cosplay!”

 

Lance choked on a laugh beside him. 

 

Keith’s face grew hot, hotter than any flame he’s lit, and he quickly let go of Lance’s waist, dropping his hands to his side.“I-uh…. T-this is a favor.”

 

Shiro took a swig from his water bottle.“Hey, man, no judgement here.My roommate dresses in some pretty interesting clothes.”

 

Keith let out a nervous laugh.

 

“Well, I’ll catch you later, Keith.”With a wave, Shiro went back to jogging.

 

Keith immediately swung around to Lance.“You!”

 

Lance crossed his arms.“So is he the reason that you want the tickets?”

 

Hunk replied for him.“Yes.”

 

“He is one tall glass of water.”Lance looked like he was thinking for a minute.“Alright, your embarrassment is good enough payment.I’ll give you the tickets since I am such a great friend.”

 

Keith really wished that a gust of wind would push Lance off the edge of the rock.


	2. oh my god, they were roommates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keith learns things and then faces the consequences of said knowledge

Every time Keith went to work since that incident, he purposely avoided Shiro.If Shiro was walking back into the building with a student, he was leaving through the back door to head to the fuel truck.If he was unable to escape in time, he avoided Shiro’s gaze.Even though he had the tickets to the aquarium, he couldn’t bring himself to actually ask the other man out.Not only did he embarrass himself not just once, but twice, in front of him, but he had decided that Shiro was simply out of his league.

 

A few weeks after the second incident, he was unable to escape Shiro.It was technically Shiro’s day off, so Keith never expected him to come to the airport, which, in hindsight was kind of stupid considering he was a pilot.

 

“Hey, Keith!”Shiro walked over to where Keith was at the desk, friendly smile on his face.

 

Keith fought the urge to look up, and instead, acted really focused on the invoices in front of him.“Hi.”

 

If Shiro noticed Keith’s reclusiveness, he ignored it.“It’s a beautiful day to fly.”

 

“I guess it is.”

 

“How are you today?”

 

“I’ve been better.”

 

“Got any plans today?”

 

“Work.”

 

“Is Iverson around?”

 

“I dunno.I didn’t think you had work today.”

 

“I don’t.”

 

“Then why are you here?”

 

“To fly?Why else?”

 

Keith just shrugged.His years as a reclusive loner were paying off.

 

“Listen Keith…”Shiro had leaned up against the counter.“Are you mad at me?”

 

At that, Keith actually looked up.“What?”

 

Shiro actually looked concerned.“Are you mad at me?You’re giving me a stand-offish vibe here.Plus, you’ve been avoiding me.If I did something wrong, please let me know so I can fix it.”

 

Keith clenched his fist so hard the pen broke and splattered ink all over him.He stood up so quickly the chair fell over.“I’m not mad!”

 

Shiro was so taken aback by the sudden outburst he took a few steps back from the counter.“Then what’s wrong?”

 

Trying to wipe the ink off his face, he took a breath and said, “I’m just frustrated.I haven’t set anything on fire in days and I’m having withdrawals and you come in here all happy and shit and you just seem so cool and I want to get to know you but you’re way too out of my league and all I’ve done is embarrass myself around you and I’m rambling so I’m gonna stop talking now.”

 

Shiro grabbed a tissue from the box on the table and walked around the desk to Keith, who was just smearing ink everywhere.“I didn’t understand a word you just said, but let’s go to the restroom to get you all cleaned up, yeah?”

 

Keith grabbed the tissue and tried wiping his hands as Shiro led him to the restrooms.

 

As Keith washed his hands, Shiro wet some paper towels.“Now, start from the beginning and slower this time.What got you all worked up?”

 

Keith sighed.“I’m not mad at you, and I’m sorry that I came off like that.I just have a lot going on right now, so I’m a bit frustrated.I didn’t mean to take it out on you like that.”He looked upfrom his hands to Shiro, who began to wipe his face off. 

 

The other man chuckled as he cleaned off Keith’s face.“It’s all good.I just got worried because I see you everyday, so I didn’t want to have a bad relationship with you.”He threw away the now black paper towel and grabbed a dry one, handing it to Keith.“How about you tell me all your frustrations over dinner.”

 

Keith dropped the paper towel.“Dinner?With you?”

 

“Well unless you want to go to dinner with my roommate, but he’s kinda weird.”Shiro chuckled and pulled out his phone, handing it to Keith.“Put in your number and I’ll call you.”

 

Keith nodded, still in shock, and typed in his number.Of course, something had to go wrong and the bathroom door opened, scaring Keith and causing him to drop Shiro’s phone.“Shit!”He quickly bent down to pick up the phone, but someone beat him to it.

 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.Here, it doesn’t look broken.”The man with the white ponytail and flannel smiled a blinding smile as he held out the phone. 

 

Shiro took the phone and smiled.“Thanks.”Turning to Keith he said, “I’ll call you.”

 

Keith just stared at the door as it closed and then to the hipster, who was getting on his nerves for some reason.“Uh, thanks.”Just as he was about to open the door to walk out, Iverson barged in.

 

“Keith!Where the hell were you when I needed help unloading President Zarkon’s plane?”

 

“Oh yeah, that was today, wasn’t it?”

 

“And now you’re making me yell in front of the president’s son!Now get your greasy ass out there and unload that plane!”

 

The apparent president’s son set his hand on Keith’s shoulder.“I’m not sure if I should tell you this now, but you have black spots all over your shirt.”

 

Keith wanted to deck him.

* * *

 

“So apparently President Zarkon is in town.”Keith took a sip of his black coffee.

 

Lance raised an eyebrow as he sipped on his caramel frappachino.“And why would he land his plane at a shitty little airport when Phoenix is only thirty minutes away?”

 

“First off, the airport may be shitty, but it’s not that little.Second off, it’s because he didn’t want everyone knowing he was here on vacation.”

 

Pidge looked up from her phone.“Who would want to vacation here?”

 

“Good point, and I don’t know.What I do know is he brought his son and he seems like a hipster brat.”

 

“Keith, you can’t just judge how someone is based on looks.”

 

“I don’t, Hunk, but if you saw him, you would know.”Keith narrowed his eyes.“I bet he’s vegan.”

 

“I’m vegan.”Allura smiled and sat down at the table.“Who else is?”

 

Lance straightened up.“Allura, you look lovely, and is that cotton candy I smell?”

 

The girl flipped her long, white hair over her shoulders.“Indeed it is!I got a new perfume!”

 

“Well, it smells lovely!”

 

“I don’t mean to interrupt, but I thought we were talking about my problems here.”

 

Pidge rolled her eyes.“We always talk about your problems.”

 

“Shut up and listen to your kpop shit.”

 

Pidge slammed her phone down and stood up, both hands bracing herself on the table.“BTS is not shit!You take that back!”

 

Hunk put his hand on Pidge’s shoulder.“Guys, I really don’t want to get kicked out of my favorite coffee shop again.Can you wait until we’re outside?”

 

Keith leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.“Well anyways the good news is that I got asked out on a date.”

 

Pidge raised an eyebrow, hands still braced on the table.“Who the fuck?”

 

“Language!”Allura warned.

 

Finally sitting down, she replied, “Sorry, whom the fuck?”

 

“His name is Shiro and he’s the super hot pilot guy in our building.”

 

“The one you’ve been pining over like a puppy for the past few months now?” Lance teased.

 

Keith rolled his eyes.“I haven’t been like a puppy.More like a lonely wolf.”

 

Allura choked on her vanilla bean soy latte.

 

Pidge threw her hands up in the air.“How come I didn’t hear about this?”

 

“Because you’ve been too invested in this guy named Suga,” Hunk shrugged.

 

“Keith,” Pidge said as she leaned back in her chair.“I live with Shiro.”

 

Lance then spit all his frappachino onto Keith’s face.“Since when?”

 

“Since my brother asked him to move in.”

 

“Matt knows Shiro?”Keith yelled as he grabbed a hand full of napkins and wiped the coffee off his face, more shocked at the fact that Pidge lived with Shiro than mad that Lance spit on him.

 

“Matt knows a lot of stuff.”

 

“And when were you going to tell me this.”

 

The small girl smirked and crossed her arms, laying her feet up on the table.“When it became relevant, as it just did.”

 

Keith stood up quickly, jolting the table and spilling Lance’s frappachino.

 

Lance frantically tried saving it before it dropped on the ground, puddle growing by the second.“Hey!That is a $7 drink right there!You owe me $7!”

 

Keith was already out the door before the Cuban boy finished.

 

Lance grumbled as he set his now empty cup on the table.“No wonder he likes his coffee black.”He crossed his arms and pouted.“It matches his soul.”

* * *

 

He set the apartment on fire again.This time, though, it was a plant in one of the hallways so Lance wouldn’t kick him out for setting any of his things ablaze.He was already on thin fucking ice because he spilled Waterboy’s fappachino shit.After finding out that Shiro lived with Pidge and Matt, he needed stress relief.So here he was, sitting in the chair at the end of the hallway, watching as the fire started to spread from the crisp tree to the walls.No negative repercussions from the landlord, of course.

 

The fire department arrived sooner than usual, giving Keith a shorter amount of time to admire the flame and greater irritation for the world.Keith just pouted, arms crossed, as a firefighter escorted him out of the building.

 

“Were you the one who’s set the fire?” The firefighter asked once they were outside.

 

Keith rolled his eyes.“What if I was?”

 

“Then you would be charged with arson, vandalism, and reckless endangerment.”

 

“What are you a cop now?”

 

“Keith, this is the second time I’ve been to this building in three weeks.The department is starting to ask questions,” the firefighter replied as he took off his helmet.Ignoring Keith’s pissed off look, he continued talking.“And I keep taking this job to keep you from getting in legal trouble.”

 

“James, why are you here?”

 

James sighed and pushed his bangs out of his eyes.He looked tired and annoyed.“I just said why I’m here.I know you, Keith.A bit too well, if you ask me.”

 

Keith huffed and looked away.“We only hooked up a few times.”

 

“That’s not what we are talking about here.”The taller man looked around.“We are talking about the fact that you have a problem setting things on fire and you need to stop.”

 

“Keith!” 

 

Keith and James both looked over to the man running towards him.“Keith, I’m so glad you’re okay!I was so worried when the alarm went off and I tried getting to your apartment but then I realized I didn’t know what unit you lived in and-“Shiro stopped mid sentence as a look of confusion crossed his face.“Griffin?What are you doing here?I thought you were in California?”

 

James has that same look of confusion.“Commander Shirogane?I didn’t know you were transferred to Phoenix.”

 

Shiro crossed his arms.“I wasn’t.I was medically discharged.Now, what’s your excuse for being here instead of flying the new aircraft?”

 

The firefighter glanced at Shiro’s metal arm then back up.“I’m considered a reservist since I’m only testing out the new aircraft every other weekend, so I do this in my spare time.”

 

“And you annoy me in the process,” Keith grumbled, not looking at either of the two men. 

 

They both turned to look at him. 

 

“Keith,” Shiro spoke up.“How do you know Griffin here?”

 

“Um...James has been kind enough to help me out during the fire situation... ”

 

James cut in.“Several fire situations.”

 

“James, do you ever know when to shut up?” Keith bit. 

 

“Yeah, I do, but you don’t considering I’ve had to shove your face into the pillow several times.”

 

“James!”

 

Shiro, who was beginning to get comfortable with the new situation, now had a look of shock on his face.“Wait, what?”

 

James raised an eyebrow.“Didn’t you know?Keith is the one who’s been starting all these fires.”He laughed, “He just gets more and more tedious to deal with.How do you two know each other?”

 

“Shiro works at the airport I do.Now please leave.”Keith was starting to get really annoyed with James’s shit.“Shiro has no desire to know what went on between me and you.”

 

“I’ll leave when you agree to stop pestering me with random fires.”

 

“Fine.Then I’ll leave.”

 

Shiro looked at him the second he tried turning around.“Where are you going, Keith?”

 

“I’m just going to grab some water.”Keith gestured in a general direction.“Oh look!Lance!He always has water!”

 

Lance, who was in a bathrobe, hair in a towel, and face black with a charcoal mask, lazered his eyes in on Keith?“Keith!I swear to god! I’m gonna kick your greasy ass!”

 

At the point, the pyromaniac would rather face Lance’s wrath than deal with James’s comments and face Shiro with the fact he slept with James.


End file.
